Extraordinary Events Taking Place in America

There’s something rotten in Denmark. The beltway is abuzz with some of the wildest rumors imaginable. ‘Is Joe Biden even alive?’ is whispered through the storied halls of the capitol. The unelected despot-in-chief seemingly renounced his election campaign via suspicious Twitter note on a lazy Sunday afternoon, after which he hasn’t been seen or heard from since. Many are now pointing out the strange idiosyncrasies surrounding the unprecedented event, including the lack of letterhead or that Biden’s signature appeared to be doctored: